reread
im saying i don't think gram has paid attention to my normally slowburn play (ill exclude my assumption it's due to brushing over my posts the majority of the time) - he has expectations of me that simply don't exist early game.
there are rare ocassions where i feel confident enough to swing right at the getgo but they're few and far between.
you're correct it's within self meta territory tho, so like ive reiterated: you see for yourself in contrast to other games or not and make a conclusion yourself
i can't help you given im self metaing
god i loathe focusing on myself because it really does nothing to progress things, but i felt it needed addressing