i have everything i could ever want, but still feel incomplete
Are you where you thought you'd be in life?
- Thread starter Delta Shell
- Start date
Yeah, pretty much.
I've got a job that I only hate a little and it pays well enough for me to live a comfortable life and pursue my hobbies in peace.
I've got a job that I only hate a little and it pays well enough for me to live a comfortable life and pursue my hobbies in peace.
Jesse Pinkman
Preeminent
It means you are in peak path of your career where you feel bored of your work and not satisified with your life direction . This is 30s syndrome where you think of switching to new job but met with limitation of lot other factor .
I suggest you should take break time to time as you get older . Never feel disappointed or feel regret you didnt exceed expectation i am sure you tried but eventually fate was something else.
Maddie
Acclaimed
No, am only 20, I dropped out of college when the pandemic hit and over the course of 2020 my mental health rapidly declined and degraded badly affecting everything fundamental about my identity, come now I'm back in college but struggling and failing because I am not as adwpt and sharp as I used to be and my job is now lower on workers my hours have jumped and prevents me from doing my schoolwork. My social life, which started to flower 2019, is completely shot and I know noome in college now due to not being on campus for a year and a half
Not at the prime of my life by any means.
Jesse Pinkman
Preeminent
I see this is very tricky situation . I suggest you speak to career counselor regarding your academic and work situation. You are taking so much responsibility at young age i believe you will come out fine because you experienced difficulties and realities so early it will help you out .
KennethDLT
Active member
No, not really. Have a couple conditions that make it hard for me in life. Chronic Anxiety disorder prevents me from doing well in jobs or in college (which were making my disorder even worse). I’m trying to see in which ways I can try and move up in life with something I know won’t ever be cured. I’m still young and I have future plans that I hope come to fruition.
Last edited:
If you can cut back on work hours, do so. Finish the schooling first, see if professors will help you before or after hours.
I was like that BEFORE the pandemic and during it I spun my life around.
It's never nort in your power to lead your life the way you want it to go. It may mean a burst of work short term but at least then you know the light at the end of the tunnel.
At your age, don't be afraid to adapt. Save money, at least a little bit to enable future pivots and changes in plans.
Delta Shell
Preeminent
To answer my own thread. I am not.
I thought i'd be married with kids by 26 but it's 10 years later and i'm neither of those things.
I never knew what career i'd go into tbh, it's not something I was ever given guidance on other than, "be a doctor" which never appealed to me. I'm reasonably happy with how my career sorta turned out despite a lack of direction but I do feel "behind" my peers on the whole starting a family front.
It's a weird conflict in my brain, I value freedom a lot (for various reasons). Marriage isn't necessarily appealing to me either but that one integral part of being an adult seems to be missing from my life and I do feel somewhat insecure about it when people ask me if I have kids etc.
I thought i'd be married with kids by 26 but it's 10 years later and i'm neither of those things.
I never knew what career i'd go into tbh, it's not something I was ever given guidance on other than, "be a doctor" which never appealed to me. I'm reasonably happy with how my career sorta turned out despite a lack of direction but I do feel "behind" my peers on the whole starting a family front.
It's a weird conflict in my brain, I value freedom a lot (for various reasons). Marriage isn't necessarily appealing to me either but that one integral part of being an adult seems to be missing from my life and I do feel somewhat insecure about it when people ask me if I have kids etc.
In all honesty I thought I wasn't but in retrospect I think I am at the moment. I thought it was apparent to get license, get a house of my own, and all that adult shit. But honestly I don't have to live up to anyone's expectations of what I should do or don't do anymore. I finally realized I'll live my life they way I want to live it and at my pace no one's else's but mine. I thought I would have all that but I don't right now and you know what I'm ok with it.
Use to get really hard on myself that I don't have a place of my own or my license yet always thinking I was a loser but now I'm over those thoughts and I've grown past them. If I don't want to get my license then I don't want to get it and if I do I do it's no one's business but my own and it's no one's problem but my own if I deem it a problem.
I'll live my life the way I want to and if anyone's going to judge me for it they should step off and worry about themselves. I'm still paying bills on time consistently, still enjoying the little things, still being an adult on my own in my own way.
Use to get really hard on myself that I don't have a place of my own or my license yet always thinking I was a loser but now I'm over those thoughts and I've grown past them. If I don't want to get my license then I don't want to get it and if I do I do it's no one's business but my own and it's no one's problem but my own if I deem it a problem.
I'll live my life the way I want to and if anyone's going to judge me for it they should step off and worry about themselves. I'm still paying bills on time consistently, still enjoying the little things, still being an adult on my own in my own way.
Well after laying joke after joke after "joke" on here I feel compelled to reply more sincerely to this thread in particular as right now I must admit I feel a bit lost in more ways than one.
Am I where I thought I'd be by now? No, and to be frank I never will. For a time I thought I might achieve what I dreamed of as a kid but the more time passes by the more I see dreams and aspirations are not delusional as the more cynical would say but rather a guideline towards what you actually can reach in whatever time you're granted on this world.
The further back I go into my childhood the more bold and honestly naive my dreams were. I started off from a very young age with the dream and dedication to become a scientist one day, so much so I actually got my little ass into that illusive biology oriented middle school class that ended up being quite the fun time of my life. It went nowhere though as reaching my 10th birthday was "rewarded" with 2 years of divorce related and resulting shenanigans and other unpleasant surprises that taught me one thing: take whatever you're given or else you'll end up with nothing at all. I don't really care about your religious, philosophical or cultural look on life and its meaning (if any) because neither does life. People often talk about equality these days, well we are indeed all equal in how we have no true agency in life, whatever choices or plans you make the final call is not up to you, whether you believe in higher power, chaotic nihilism/anarchism or luck it all leads to hoping that at least some of your wishes end up becoming reality.
So what now for me? Who knows. This pandemic messed up more than I'm willing to admit or accept, whatever dreams or plans I had are right now in perpetual turmoil and lets be honest that's exciting in a way. I HATE chaos and disorder to the very atoms that make whatever makes me me but at least that chaos is something that will hopefully birth a whole new swarm of opportunities for this tough but tired insect.
Am I where I thought I'd be by now? No, and to be frank I never will. For a time I thought I might achieve what I dreamed of as a kid but the more time passes by the more I see dreams and aspirations are not delusional as the more cynical would say but rather a guideline towards what you actually can reach in whatever time you're granted on this world.
The further back I go into my childhood the more bold and honestly naive my dreams were. I started off from a very young age with the dream and dedication to become a scientist one day, so much so I actually got my little ass into that illusive biology oriented middle school class that ended up being quite the fun time of my life. It went nowhere though as reaching my 10th birthday was "rewarded" with 2 years of divorce related and resulting shenanigans and other unpleasant surprises that taught me one thing: take whatever you're given or else you'll end up with nothing at all. I don't really care about your religious, philosophical or cultural look on life and its meaning (if any) because neither does life. People often talk about equality these days, well we are indeed all equal in how we have no true agency in life, whatever choices or plans you make the final call is not up to you, whether you believe in higher power, chaotic nihilism/anarchism or luck it all leads to hoping that at least some of your wishes end up becoming reality.
So what now for me? Who knows. This pandemic messed up more than I'm willing to admit or accept, whatever dreams or plans I had are right now in perpetual turmoil and lets be honest that's exciting in a way. I HATE chaos and disorder to the very atoms that make whatever makes me me but at least that chaos is something that will hopefully birth a whole new swarm of opportunities for this tough but tired insect.
Ironically enough, I dropped out of Art/Web design college at the age of 20 and soon as my customer service director demolished any dream I had of joining the I.T. department, I rushed my ass to the nearest school and it was basically hell for two years stronk. 3-4 hour sleep for two years with a really annoying girlfriend and family drama at the time didn't do me any justice. I nearly died on October 3rd, 2013 from ventricular fibrillation due to mass amounts of caffeine intake and stress adding onto that. I didn't know how much harm I was doing to my body because I was always ignorant of my own self-awareness and my pride typically got the best of me. In 2016, after achieving my dream of becoming a giant computer nerd while using an old mail server blade as a foot stool on the executive floor of my customer service job, I relocated to GA and all hell broke loose again from then on out. Got into a car accident, nearly died once again, but left me with road rash and a big ass open and closing parenthesis on my right shoulder after the ground tore parts of my shoulder skin off. Without a mode of accelerated transportation, I waddled my ass a whole hour to and from the office daily and busted my ass until I decided that these mfs weren't taking me seriously.
Fast-forward to some time in 2017, tried getting back into college again to upgrade from my associate's degree which didn't mean shit to this company and especially if I wanted to become a seasoned developer. Manged to finish my first two easy ass courses and not feeling motivated enough to finish the others for my first time. I done fucked up and had to take them next term anyways and wasted money that I could have used at this point to pay off another term with a grant. New girlfriend at the time also drove me fucking bananas and wanted all my attention to be on her without taking into consideration that I was juggling work, school, and her personal issues/depression. I eventually came back to NYC, horrible fucking idea as I eventually learned that the new company I joined was basically setting me up for failure and I was eventually going to be turned into A.I. Parents were at their worst to while I was staying with them as they fought tooth and nail daily until I finally got they asses to break up. They are in a good spot now as they really needed that break. Back to NYC bs, I basically had a psychiatric meltdown after my cousin Niegel jumped out of a five story building in an attempted suicide, survived, broke most of his bones, and that alone made my brain collapse. I contemplated taking my own life because the depression was unforgiving and intense, but I fought back as hard as I could and my brain eventually split my subconscious into multiple parts and locked away all of the crazy ones. Therapy didn't help much, so I ended up learning to work out and got ripped af before the pandemic hit and now here we are in 2021 and my ass about to graduate, get a drivers license finally, and thinking about my next big move.
The moral of this story is simply to don't limit yourself to what you think your maximum capabilities are. I thought my ass was a dumb dumb for a long time and it turns out that I'm really good with numbers and can write really good papers (with the aid of Grammarly ofc which has helped me with my writing skills. I'm also preparing for a role transition from support to software quality assurance at my new job and I am mentally in the best shape of my life right now because I am pushing myself past my limits. I'm not gonna run this tl;dr through Grammarly because I want this to be a brain dump that people can hopefully use as a stepping stone to get where they want and need to be in life.
Anything is possible as long as you believe in yourself, believe you are special in your own way and not let others tell you otherwise, and simply when you are at your lowest, it is okay to develop a support system and reach out to them for help.
I offer any of you help whenever you need technical, career, or life advice if I'm able to provide any at all.
In hindsight, thank you for taking the time to read this and know that I am looking forward to hearing upcomings and success stories as the years progress.
Probably not.
My dream as a kid was to be a police officer, a air plane pilot and a amazing gymnast.
My [REDACTED] Stopped me from being a police officer, due to my (REDACTED) making me unsuitable to be a officer.
I got scared of heights and speed velocity after my fathers driving, so that didnt work out.
And I broke 2 discs in my back during a training session at my gym, so I couldnt join the olympic team.
But I'm happy. We all get blue but as im now, im happy. My dream now is to become a librarian or working at a scifi-fantasy book store.
My dream as a kid was to be a police officer, a air plane pilot and a amazing gymnast.
My [REDACTED] Stopped me from being a police officer, due to my (REDACTED) making me unsuitable to be a officer.
I got scared of heights and speed velocity after my fathers driving, so that didnt work out.
And I broke 2 discs in my back during a training session at my gym, so I couldnt join the olympic team.
But I'm happy. We all get blue but as im now, im happy. My dream now is to become a librarian or working at a scifi-fantasy book store.
ITT: Am graduate naow am bless
[REDACTED] messing with people's dreams and aspirations too? I will not any of this